“Your art is not about how many people like your work, your art is about if your heart likes your work. It’s about if your soul likes your work, it’s about how honest you are with yourself and you must never trade honesty for relatability.” from ‘Milk and Honey’
Lately, I have been feeling like I am drowning in life, with the kids, chores, endless to do’s and wife duties. I am having trouble finding the balance between everything that is currently on my plate. I have been feeling like I don’t have enough time for me, time to do the things I love to do. I love my boys, I love my husband and I love dedicating my entire life to them. I feel so blessed and I truly do love my life. But sometimes I wish time would sit still to be able to take off my mom hat just for a second and just sit there and breathe. Somedays I wake up to the smell of delicious pre-made coffee and other times I wake up to the smell of my roommate’s stinky overflowing dirty diaper. Some days are filled with rainbows and unicorns and other’s well, we simply stay in our PJs and just cry.
The other day I meet this incredible woman at Michael’s who said to me, “Hey you’re mrsfriastorres from Instagram?” I turned around and said, “what?” She smiled and said “I love your blog and your Instagram posts. I love you as a woman, mother and human being. I love how much I can relate to you and I love how real you are with your words.” She then asked me, “What do you love doing most, like what sets your soul on fire aside from being a mom?” I completely choked and for the very first time, I felt like someone was actually interested in what I like to do and for the first time in a very long time I felt like my old self and I remember exactly why I created this space.
That same day I went home and sat on my desk. I wrote down everything she had said and how it made me feel, I open my journal and made a list of everything that makes me smile and what makes my soul feel alive. After crying so much that day I made a promise to myself to find the balance and make time for me. I will wake up earlier and exercise, I will recharge my batteries by going to bed early instead of trying to catch up on housework. I will paint more, I will read more, I will actually get dressed and take the kids out more often instead of being inside the house all day. I will dedicate more time to my blog, I will go on that coffee date my friend and I have been planning to go on for months but has yet to happen. I will dance more like no one is watching and start our days with gentleness. I wish we had exchanged numbers to tell her what an impact she made in my life that day.
You see many people don’t understand that us “mothers” are more than just that! We are allowed to have goals, aspirations and most important have time to ourselves and enjoy what we love to do as well. So my message to all my moms today is, stop doing chores and start doing more of what you love and I am here to tell ya, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Stop comparing your life to other moms because guess what I use to do it too. Stop being so hard on your self and start by loving and taking care of your mind, body, soul. The next time you pass by a mirror give yourself a compliment. The next time you see your stretch marks remember to wear them with pride because guess what all real women have them. Embrace your beautiful curves and the next time you exercise remember you are doing it for your health. Write down your thoughts, vent to a friend, go to church do whatever you need to do. If you haven’t found your passion don’t give up, search until you find it, because when you do I promise you won’t regret the time you spend searching for it. Create a life you enjoy living. Slow down and remember to breathe, find the balance and always find the time to love and care for yourself. Never underestimate the joy of relaxation.